The Benefit of Encouragement

After being sick for three weeks, I finally cracked a book open.  It turns out that the very first thing I read, I just have to share!  The following excerpt is from The Power of a Positive Mom, by Karol Ladd.

A number of years ago, a junior high teacher from Minnesota wrote a letter to "Dear Abby," telling the story of a remarkable life lesson she learned from her students.  She began by describing a difficult day in her math class when the kids were particularly cranky with one another and discouraged about the lesson.  Frustrated, the teacher told the class to put away their math books and place one sheet of blank paper on their desks.  She then instructed them to list the names of their classmates along the left hand side of the page and to write next to each name the nicest thing they could think of to say about each person.  The impromptu exercise helped, because as the students turned in their assignments, the teacher noticed everyone was a little more relaxed and at ease. 

Over that weekend, the teacher took the time to write each student's name on a blank page and painstakingly copied the kind thoughts that were expressed about each of the kids.  On Monday morning, she handed the students their lists.  The room was abuzz with whispers and comments such as "Wow, really?" "I didn't know anyone liked me that much!" "I never knew that meant anything to anyone."  Then the assignment was put away, and class continued, with the students feeling better about themselves and one another.

Years later, the math teacher attended the untimely funeral of one of her students who was killed while serving his country in Vietnam.  After the service, the parents of this brave young man approached the teacher and said, "We want to show you something Mark was carrying when he was killed."  The father pulled a crumpled piece of paper from his wallet, and as he unfolded it, the teacher recognized her handwriting.  It was the paper from that long-ago assignment containing all the nice things the young man's classmates had said about him! The parents thanked the teacher, saying that their son had always treasured the encouraging words.

Other former students standing nearby spoke up.  One smiled sheepishly, saying he kept his list of compliments in his top desk drawer at home.  Another said his sheet had been placed in his wedding album.  A third person pulled out his wallet and proudly displayed his folded page as if it were a prized possession. Overwhelmed, the teacher sat down and cried, realizing the full value of that impromptu assignment and the power of encouraging words.

Abby responded to the teacher's letter in her column with a quote from George Herbert: "Good words are worth much and cost little."

There is no greater investment we can make in the lives of our children than giving them generous doses of encouraging words.  It costs us so little in time and effort, but the rewards are priceless.  When our young people are reminded of their God-given value, they receive deposits of confidence, security, and well-being in their emotional bank accounts.  They begin building on their strengths, knowing they have something to contribute to this world.  On the other hand, when our children have nothing positive to believe about themselves, their emotional back accounts can become bankrupt-overdrawn by the negative comments and disappointments that occur every day in the world around them.

I too, am a firm believer in encouraging others, especially our children.  I hope this excerpt gives you encouragement to encourage your loved ones a lot more than you already do! 

Quote

 

 

"There will always be things we want to see happen in our lives, but we can learn to enjoy where we are, on the way to where we are going."

Kind Words

 



In Holley Gerth's book, You Were Made For a God-Sized Dream, she states so perfectly, "Kind words are becoming an endangered species. A friend who will rejoice in your successes as much as her own is a treasure indeed.  A woman who will say, "Yes, with God you can do this" is a beautiful and hard-to-find wonder."

The very last part of that quote is who I want to be, "a beautiful and hard-to-find wonder."  It used to be difficult for me to compliment people.  I was much younger and life was a big competition.  It didn't matter who it was, a friend, a co-worker or even a family member, I wasn't going to dish out any compliments.  Mostly because I knew that person wanted them.  And after all, no one was sending compliments my way!  I know that sounds terrible, judge me if you will, but I know from experience, I am not the only one who practiced this sad and pitiful existence.  That was until I met a wonderful and beautiful friend, Sara. 

Sara was the first woman I met that poured out compliments.  For the first time, I met someone who wasn't afraid or low in self-esteem to share words like, "You're looking pretty, today" or "That is a good color on you" or "You are a great mama."  I remember one day in particular, I was over at her house while she was hosting a family gathering.  I was in the house doing, what, I have no idea, but when I walked out into the garage all heads turned my way, she said, "They were saying that your daughter was a cutie and I told them, 'wait until you see her mama.'" Now don't get me wrong, it was a very nice compliment and one that I remember to this day, but I was left embarrassed.  Do you know why?  I was feeling very insecure that day. I felt ten pounds heavier than usual and didn't feel comfortable in my clothes.  I debated on whether or not I would be going to her house in the first place.  And in that moment all eyes were on me! Something I was hoping to avoid.  But it was that one compliment that settled me down and helped me get over a bit of social anxiety.  Those few words took a bit of my insecurities away, if only for a day. 

It took some time, but I began to practice the art of complementing.  I no longer find it difficult to say, "You look so pretty today, your face is glowing" or "You are a great cook, you could so open a restaurant or bakery."  Guess what happened when I started complementing?  I walked away BEAMING.  I didn't receive the compliment, but I found enough confidence in myself to allow someone to feel special....and it felt exhilarating! It felt exhilarating because I knew my words gave a boost of exhilaration to the one receiving the compliment.  The best part...it only took a few words! 

So why is it so hard for many of us?  Maybe we need to examine who we are in Christ and trust that we, too, are very special, whether anyone acknowledges it or not. When we start believing our worth in Christ, we automatically feel confident in our own skin allowing us to dish out kind words more freely. 

Daughters of Christ, lets pour out kind words, you just never know who may be needing them! 

Gracious words are a honeycomb,
    sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.  Proverbs 16:24

Love

If you read Dilapidated Insides, you know of how God spoke to my heart about fostering and growing in the fruit of the Spirit.  The other day, something so beautiful and almost breathtaking was revealed to me.  I have two wonderful daughters.  I have a fifteen-year-old and a six-year-old.  My girls are sweet girls.  But like most humans, they have their moments when they are not so sweet.  As a mom, I always hope for and want the best for them.  Whether it be good relationships with friends, a soccer goal or a part in the school play, I'm in constant hope for them.  One particular day, I was praying for my eldest daughter.  She was about to start a new school year and there were so many things that I needed to pray for.  As I'm praying and hoping for a promising year for my daughter, this little voice in my head argued, "Even though she doesn't always deserve it." It was only a few seconds when the Lord spoke quietly to my heart: You don't always deserve my blessings, but I still bless you, because I love you.

My eyes spilled over quickly. Truth, whether it's spoken gently or harshly, pierces certain nerves.  I am very blessed.  I am very much loved.  And I don't deserve it.  The tears ran as I realized just how much he loves.  Not only did he confirm how much he loves me, even when I have my rotten moments, but how much he loves and looks beyond my daughters rotten moments, too. He's going to bless her, even though she doesn't deserve it.  He's going to bless me, even though I don't deserve it.  He's going to bless you, even though you don't deserve it.

I thought about the many times when my children wanted this or that.  I agreed they could have this particular thing based on condition.  When they failed at earning their "prize," many times I would concede anyway.  We sometimes do that as parents.  We love our children so much and if we can put a smile on their face, we do what we can to make that happen.  In some ways, God is like that...eager to put a smile on our face.

We don't have to be perfect to earn God's love and blessings.  If it's in His power, and it is, He's going to do it.  He does it because He loves. 

God  IS  love. 1 John 4:8

Faith Without Deeds

 

 

 

"Faith without deeds is useless."

James 2:20

 

 

The definition of the word useless is defined as: not fulfilling or not expected to achieve the intended purpose or desired outcome.

 

When I read the definition of the word "useless" and then reread the above verse, I paused as if I had just been scolded and put in "timeout."  I'm not sure about you, but I don't want to exist only to be useless.

"not expected to achieve"

What would the KING have you achieve?  What intended purpose does he have for you? What desired outcome is he looking for? 

I used to believe that my faith would be enough.  And although it is enough for my salvation, is it enough to make a difference?  I want to make a difference.  I want to be used.  I want my abilities and talents to be shared.  After all, He equipped me with them to begin with!

We can go about our days keeping all of our gifts to ourselves; or we can make a vow to never live a useless existence and start looking for ways to share good deeds.  Imagine what kind of example we could be if we have our faith and deeds working together!!

Strive to be useful!



Proverbs 31 Day 2 (Donna Partow)

 Day 2 ~ Commit Yourself to Time Alone with God

Very early in the morning while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.  Mark 1:35

Key Points

*The Proverbs 31 woman got up while it was still dark.

* The reason Proverbs 31 woman's husband could have full confidence in her is because she had full confidence in God.

*Confidence in a relationship comes from investing time in that relationship. If we want to have something valuable to offer the world, we must first have something valuable to offer.

*We can rush out the door first thing in the morning in pursuit of stuff to buy and give to our loved ones, but the things of this world are fleeting and have no lasting value. Instead, let's invest our time seeking heavenly treasures, like spiritual insight, knowledge of Scripture, the power to demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit, and the ability to carry the presence of God with us wherever we go.

*If we want to be an inspiration to everyone you meet, meet with God first.

Affirmation: I commit myself to time alone with God.

My Thoughts

It is not easy to get out of bed earlier than needed.  I admit, a few extra minutes of sleep are always very tempting. What I have noticed is that getting a few extra minutes of sleep rarely keeps me focused throughout the day.  But when I get myself out of bed at least a half an hour earlier to spend with the King, I feel recharged.  What many of us fail to realize is that the God of all things, wants to meet with us.  Wherever we are.  Not only does he want to spend time with us, He also wants to give us the guidance we need to face our days.  He IS a father ready and willing to meet with his children.  The time he wants to invest in us as a parent, is worth the quality time set aside for him.  When I think of all we miss when we are not taking advantage of that relationship, it almost takes my breath away.  The knowledge, the wisdom, the comfort, the encouragement and the love that we can receive from Christ, is like a glass of iced water.  Refreshing and very much needed.

Commit to sharing quality time with your Creator.

2 Peter 3:9

 

 

 

 "The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness.  He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9

I know many people who are up in age who have not accepted Jesus yet.  I always think about this verse, hoping and praying they will have enough time to accept salvation in Christ.  This verse demonstrates the Lord's love and patience.  How blessed we are to have the God of all things patient with humanity.

 

Proverbs 31 Day 1 (Donna Partow)

 

Below, is the book I'll be discussing for the next 90 days (I may or may not write about each day).  Donna Partow's, Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be, is a 90 day guide through Proverbs 31.  This book has been both inspirational and motivational. 

 

 

 

Partow encourages readers to start a daily planner/organizer as a tool to be used with the book. Here is mine.  A tablet would be another great way to organize your notes, affirmations, scriptures and other projects. I am "old school" when it comes to planning and note keeping.

 

 

 

Let's begin!

 

A wife of noble character who can find?

She is worth far more than rubies.

Her husband has full confidence in her

and lacks nothing of value.

                                      Proverbs 31:10-11 

Key points for Day 1

*To be noble means to be dignified and gracious. (character traits) "capable, intelligent, and virtuous"

*God wants us to stand out as women who know we have something valuable to offer the    world...we  inspire full confidence in those who rely on us most, whether our husband, children, employer or co-worker.

*The people around us can have full confidence in us because we have full confidence in God.

*You may or may not have an earthly husband, but you do have a heavenly Husband.  Married or single, God wants you to be his wife of noble character.

Affirmation: I place my full confidence in God. He has a good purpose for my life.

My Thoughts:

(10) A wife of noble character, who can find?
A wife with nobility and sound character is hard to come by. Look around you and you will find more and more women making wrong choices in how they conduct themselves. A wife who is noble in character is a rare find, therefore she is worth far more than rubies.
(11) Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. Does your earthly husband have full confidence in you?  Can he rely on you to keep the house orderly (laundry, cleanliness, stocked refrigerator, meals, guidance with the children, financial restraint, hospitality,  etc.)? These things are of great value to a husband. In addition to these, intimacy would most definitely be at the top of that list.  All husbands are different.  You might have a list that looks completely different from this.  If you're not certain, discuss with your husband what he views valuable.

Matthew 6:33; James 4:8

 

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Matt 6:33

"Come near to God and he will come near to you." James 4:8

Feeling Ambitious

I woke feeling ambitious this morning.  A real bonus, since that is not always the case.  Since it was wet and somewhat rainy and humid, I opted to walk on the treadmill. I love getting that out of the way first thing!

Like most mornings, I prepare to read my Bible, when a certain book runs through my mind. Then another one. Then another.  So comes the ambition!

Since I enjoy reading and enjoy learning, I plan on doing a lot of it!  By the way, I have read all of these books already, however, there are a few that I haven't exactly finished, like Marriage on the Rock and A Woman of Moderation.  But you know how it is with a good book; worthy of another read.  And since I feel this would be a good place to share some great little nuggets of revelations, I want to reread these inspiring books and share them with you!
So there's my ambition for the next few weeks!

If you would like to read any of the above books, but don't have the time or really don't like to read, check here for some excerpts.  If I find something worth sharing, I will put it here.

On to today's revelation:

If you read yesterday's post, you read this verse:

Be very careful, then how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.  Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is." Ephesians 5:15-17

What stood out to me yesterday was "making the most of every opportunity." Today though, this part of the verse demanded my attention, "live--not as unwise but as wise."  Do you ever go about your day making stupid decisions.  For example, eating something that has no nutritional value whatsoever and then wonder why your jeans are getting tighter?! Or maybe you spend well over your intended budget when you go to Kohl's or Hobby Lobby :/. There are so many decisions we make throughout the day that could really be classified as unwise.  Maybe you belittled your spouse or your child.  Maybe while spending some time with a girlfriend, your friendly conversation turned into gossiping.  Or perhaps that annoying addiction of yours won you over because of your unwise choice to surrender to it.

We all tend to make unwise decisions.  This verse warns us to be careful.  Not just careful, but very careful. We are also told that the days are evil.  This is what that means to me.  Our adversary, Satan, wants us to make foolish decisions.  One foolish decision leads to another and another; keeping us in the same cycle that we are trying to break. Every day is a battle for many of us.  Your struggle may look different from mine, but the similarity is this, Satan wants you in bondage to it.

The last part of the verse: "do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is." We should understand that the Lord's will is always for us to be wise--to live with wisdom.  That really is his will!  It's mentioned right there in the beginning of the verse.  If we become wise with our decisions, think about how much more we can "make the most of every opportunity"!!
 
If you need a daily inspiration verse, let it be this one!  Write it down on a Post-it or index card.  Keep it with you throughout the day.  When you are close to making an unwise decision, whatever it may be, meditate on this verse.  Break it up into little pieces and pray about each one!!

Okay, so I know I could have broke this up into two posts, but that is how the cookie crumbles sometimes.  Too many things floating around in my brain that I just feel the need to share!


Have a great and very wise day!!!

A Real Mess

 

 

A Real Mess

           Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit. Psalms 147:5



That title couldn't have said it any better. A few weeks ago we had a power outage. I should point out that we get power outages a LOT! For the past ten years or so of power outages, nothing has really gone terribly wrong. Besides the one winter where power was out for fourteen hours and the temperature in the house dropped to 54 degrees! Yeah, that was the night we all piled up into our bed to sleep.  So, not a comfortable night of sleep.  I love my family, but I'm sorry, the only person I want to share my bed with, is my hubby. Anyway...

We lost power again for about six hours.  It was storming pretty heavily. But life went on as usual and days passed.  We would soon be getting ready to leave for Tennessee for a week long vacation (posting about that later).  The day before, my husband crawls into the crawl space for something and discovers that we flooded!  Are you kidding me?  The power outage kept the sump from pumping and we flooded. But you see, that power outage was about a week ago!  We were leaving the next day (for a week)! We couldn't tackle the project then and there.  So we agreed that we would take care of it when we got back.  The crawl space wasn't flooded at the time. The water that did pool, maybe two inches according to water lines on boxes, had already receded. Aye, aye, aye.

When we returned, I (only me) could smell a bit of mildew.  Ewww! I hate that smell. When we finally had a window of time to work on it, well, let me just say, it was a real pain. Thankfully we had two rolls of carpet padding and boxes to soak up a lot of the water which kept if from spreading. Because of that, all of the wood remained bone dry.  Always looking at a half-full glass!

The job was awful.  Poor Hubby hauled out most everything by himself.  He didn't let me help much at all, unless it was a light bag of trash. He can be so stubborn sometimes, but a gentleman always. I don't know if I mentioned how much I like books.  I'm a bit of book nerd, and, well you probably see where I'm going with this.  I have several plastic bins of books.  Heavy bins of books! I don't know how my husband didn't complain about the heavy book bins. But he didn't. He complained about most everything else, though, if I'm gonna be honest. lol!

This job was awful.  I know I said that already, but it was soooo awful. I lost many Christmas decorations; which didn't really bother me. I'm ready for some new stuff anyway. :) But then...my husband handed me a bag of our daughter's baby clothes. I know you are probably wondering why they were not in a plastic bin like all those stupid books.  Well this plastic bag was one of those heavy duty thick plastic ones. But stupid me, the bottom of the bag had a seam that was not airtight. I opened the bag, stuck my nose in it and walked into my laundry room and cried (people, I'm really not a big crier. So for my eyes to brim over with tears, means my heart is really breaking). Nothing else mattered to me. All my plans of handing over those little treasures to my daughter died.  Her first ever denim jacket, first swimsuit, her 'take home from the hospital outfit,' her Christmas dress, Valentine dress, nightgown, bonnets, and so many others. As I pulled each little memory out of the bag, I noticed that they were all in pristine condition. No green mold or anything growing on them.  Just a mildew smell.  What the heck. I'm gonna give it a try. I threw them in the washer with a cup full of Tide and a cup full of vinegar and I prayed. You know I'm not kidding. I really prayed. When the wash cycle was done, I pulled out item after item and buried my nose in each one, taking in the fresh scent...and then I cried some more! Happy tears! Oh, thank you Jesus, tears!. Our little treasures were saved!!!

Life is a lot like that. Tragedies come to find you. Not just a little flooding, but real life tragedies. Broken marriages, sickness, financial ruin, addictions, mama blues and a plethora of other things.  We get to a breaking point and want to give up. Life, for the most part, will have its messes. You can take notice of it right away and do something about it. Or you can put it off and find that it will most likely get worse. No matter where you are, those messes can be cleaned up.  Those messes can be put back together.  Those messes can be washed away, leaving a fresh scent of newness! A lot of times, it takes just a simple prayer. "Lord, help me with this mess!" It may involve some tears. Tears of sorrow. Tears of brokenness. But after the "storm" has passed, you can count on tears of joy! Once the mess is swept away and the ugly ruined junk is thrown in the dumpster, and the stank is no longer in the air, life gets better.

I wondered why we had this crawl space flooding after ten years of power outages. I looked at this mess this morning....

....and thought about what a daunting task it would be to get it all cleaned up. And then it dawned on me that this mess was a perfect example of life.  It's going to take picking up each piece one by one. Saving what can be saved; marriage, family, self, etc.. And dumping what needs dumping; addictions, worry, depression, self, etc..  It will take time. It will take patience. It will take prayer. But eventually, the pieces will find their way. And a new start will begin!

Tina

An Imperfect Friend

 

An Imperfect Friend
 
There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. (NLT)
Proverbs 18:24

Over the years I have made many friends.  Some of those friendships still exist today!  And sadly, for one reason or another, some friendships have died. 

I have had the privilege of navigating my teenage daughter through some friendship woes. Having experienced seasons of friendship woes myself, who better than me to guide her through it!

I have learned many things over the years and the one thing that I feel important to share with my daughter is this: People are imperfect, even friends.

Unfortunately, we sometimes put unattainable expectations on our imperfect friends.  Our friends should always say the right things. They should always do the right things. They should know exactly how we feel.  They should boost our ego at the appropriate time.  They should never put another friend before us.  They should always be available for us.  They should never be better than us at anything. They should never be skinnier than us.  They should never be prettier than us. They should never display their annoying antics in our presence.  And they should NEVER make a mistake (because if they do, God help them!).

Let's face it, friendship comes with many conditions.  Until we, as teenage girls and women, realize that we sabotage our own support systems, we will never truly experience genuine friendship.

Proverbs 18:24
There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. (NLT)

A few years back, I learned a very important lesson from a women's conference: In order to keep our friendships whole, we must be willing to accept at least three glaring flaws or imperfections in our friends. And the reason for this is...we have many imperfections of our own.

As I get older and experience more of life, I see my own imperfections a lot more clearly.  I realize that I struggle in many areas and don't always win the 'Best Friend' award. Instead of recognizing where I could improve as a friend, I sometimes opt for the easy way out... and avoid the person altogether.  If I really want to deny my failures as a friend, I might even blame them for my avoidance. After all, it's easier to put the blame on them than to make some much needed changes in myself.  How terribly wrong is that!

Ladies, your friends will make mistakes.  Be certain of it. She will make mistakes because she is imperfect. Let us stop putting unattainable expectations on our girlfriends.  Lets expect them to hurt our feelings once in a while.  And when they do, lets forgive them.  Lets love them and encourage them.  Lets admire their gifts. Lets boost them up when they need boosting. Lets give them genuine compliments (After all, compliments are hard to come by for some of us).  And while we're at it, lets encourage our daughters to do the same!

Relationships take work; friendships are no different.  True friends stick it out, through good times and bad.  Until we admit that we are imperfect, we will never truly accept imperfections in others...not even our friends.


Tina

Some Little Nuggets

I promised to share some excerpts from books I'm reading.  Today, I want to share from, Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be by Donna Partow.  I don't know how many times I have read this book, but it is one of my very favorites.  Here are a few quotes from the book:

The reason the Proverbs 31 woman's husband could have full confidence in her is because she had full confidence in God.

True, we can rush out the door first thing in the morning in pursuit of stuff to buy and give to our loved ones, but the things of this world are fleeting and have no lasting value. Instead, let's invest our time in seeking heavenly treasures, like spiritual insight, knowledge of Scripture, the power to demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit, and the ability to carry the presence of God with us wherever we go.

If you want to be an inspiration to everyone you meet, meet with God first.

Affirmation: I commit myself to time alone with God.

Let It Seep

If we are serious about our goal of becoming a capable, dignified, virtuous woman of noble character, we will have to do more than casually read the Bible.  We have to meditate on it so it seeps deep down into the fiber of our being.  If we want to be women who can stand firm in the face of Satan's onslaught of temptations, then we need the Word of God on our lips. ~Donna Partow

When I read the above excerpt today, I realized how much I have slacked in my devotion time.  I have had my prayer walks, but my prayers have been cut short due to other distractions rambling in my brain. For one, I've been distracted by all things "back to school."  I'm now anxious to get started with our homeschool year, and because of my excitement, I have spoke vague prayers and skimmed through my Bible reading ("casual reader") so that I can set my focus on classroom set up and curriculum review. 

It's interesting how quickly a person can feel depleted, though.  I sometimes feel that way with my husband.  When our schedules pull us in two different directions, it doesn't take long to feel the distance between us, until we hit pause and get reacquainted.  That is how the past couple of weeks have been with my Jesus.  I feel myself drifting. I feel like I have looked up and found myself standing on a deserted island wondering how I got there. I feel a bit empty.  Does that make sense?  This is nothing new, though.  I have found myself on that empty island many times.  Thankfully, He always calls me back.  Sometimes it is simply the empty feeling that calls me back.  Other times, it is a struggle or worry that calls me back.  This is the case this time. Struggle. Worry.  As ridiculous as it may sound, it is the struggle and worry that I'm thankful for.  Because of it, I find myself pausing and turning back. I turn back because I know how exactly painful life can get when I go it alone.  And I just can't do life alone.

We have to meditate on it so it seeps deep down into the fiber of our being.  The school year is about to begin and I need my "guide book" even more than ever.  I need to meditate on the Bible. I need to let it seep deep down into the fiber of who I am.  Because who I am determines what I do and what I do could mean all the difference in the life of one. 

Come near to God and he will come near to you. James 4:8

Dilapidated Insides

 

Dilapidated Insides

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Galations 5:22
 

　
After forty years of life, God finally “put me in my place.” Of course I think to myself, why wait so long, Lord? But the realization that He is who he is, quickly silences my argument. How blessed I am that he didn’t wait any longer! You see, for many years I believed that I was a "good" Christian. On the outside, I’m sure others believed it too. It was important for me to convey my goodness to others. But who was I kidding?

I was and still am a devoted Christian. I spend time with my Jesus in prayer, almost daily (I say almost, because, let’s be real, my day pulls me in many directions the moment my feet hit the floor!). In addition to my prayer walk, I read my Bible very regularly.  When I feel convicted, I scribble those convictions on paper and pray about them. I attend church and even volunteer with our children’s ministry. I love my God and his son Jesus. Truthfully, He loves me even more. And because He loves me so much more, He finally “put me in my place.”

One morning, I woke from a dream; a dream very similar to others I had in the past. In my dream, my husband and I are in the market to buy a house. Our house hunt begins with many different styles of homes. After a long day of searching, our realtor finally drives us up a hill where a very grand and beautiful house stood. I look over at my husband and whisper, “Could we afford this house?” My husband shrugs his shoulders and reaches for my hand, giving it a hopeful squeeze. The view from this house is breathtaking. Again, how could we afford such a house? It is a big house, with many rooms. We begin our tour and I quickly understand why this home is in our price range. It needs some work. The carpet is mismatched from room to room. The walls are dark and dingy, paint peeling from every corner. The floors are lifted in areas and holes are placed randomly on the walls. As we continue our tour, I start to see potential. “I want this house” I tell my husband. But my husband, scared-off by the magnitude of the work, convinces me that it’s too dilapidated and not anything we could take on. We walk away from my potential “dream home.” And then I wake up...

Year after year, another dilapidated grandiose house dream. What could these dreams mean? I immediately think that perhaps we will find ourselves face to face with a ‘fixer upper.’ Are we handy enough to restore it? Are we brave enough to take it on?  Reality sets in and I think to myself, we're just not that handy.

How surprised I was when I clearly heard the Lord (inaudibly, of course) say, “You, are that house.” Paralyzed with this newfound revelation, I finally concede. It’s me.  I'm dilapidated. I’m a ‘fixer-upper.‘ Humble pie doesn’t even come close to how I felt. What do I do now? How do I begin to restore and clean up my insides? Where do I even begin?

A few Sundays later, while sitting in church, my pastor begins his message by speaking about restoring old homes and how we are like these dilapidated houses. I sat there in amazement. Sure, this message was for everyone, but I felt like it was meant specifically for me.  I sat there wondering how many rooms need repairing? To my surprise, the number nine shouts at me in my mind. I question God, “Really? Nine? Are you sure not five or something? Why nine?” But as hard as I try to conjure up a smaller number, none come up. I continued listening to the message that morning, perspiration finding every wish way to escape.  Up on the screen were the Fruit of the Spirit....all nine of them!

 Fruit of the Spirit; this is where I begin.  This is where I start restoring my dilapidated insides. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Galations 5:22. I take this all in and wonder which one I should focus on first. It seemed as though God answered, “Start with love.” And so I do. I start with love and watch God slowly begin to restore my insides.

I look forward to dreaming about a grand house on a hill with an immaculate interior. Where the breeze gently blows the curtains to and fro; inviting all who come near.  Where light shines so bright, illuminating every drab corner.  Where plush carpeting invites you to walk about this grandiose home; taking in the pleasures of it.  Where splashes of color sing and dance on the walls.  Where sweet fragrances permeate the air.  Where grand furniture whispers, “sit and rest a while.”

Until I dream that dream, I will always be grateful that God saw potential in my dilapidated insides. Enough potential that He would say, “I want this one. There's so much potential here.” I will always be grateful that He gave me nine rooms to start my restoration...and grateful, that after forty years, He finally “put me in my place.”

 Tina